Help me spend more Christmas with my family

This has got to be my longest, hardest and most painful post ever. Coz it's like admitting to all that hey I am no longer the old Rose, Rosel, Roselyn that everyone knew. The once active, hyper, loud, optimistic or whatever Rosel is somehow missing.
I've been battling the big C since October 2019. Cutaneous T Cell Lymphoma 2B. This cancer has no known cure yet so what we do is control it. Once a treatment is over another treatment should commence. I went through several chemo drugs, immunotherapy, multiple radiation, PUVA, etc.. so many treatments that I didnt even know existed. But still disease progression was evident. Tumors here and there.
I was optimistic at first. I knew i can get through it. But over time it changed me and it still is. Looking at the mirror I see a different person. I don't even wanna look at the mirror most of the time coz' I dont see me. It greatly affected my family which breaks my heart so much. Every single day, I feel so sorry for my husband doing everything when I should be helping him. My kids running to me when I scream in pain or say I cant breath. They just dont deserve this. It's exhausting not just physically, emotionally, mentally, financially... consuming in all aspects.
The pain, the itch, the weakness and everything that I feel which I can't explain to anyone is debilitating. When the pain is excruciating or when the itch is just unthinkable to point of it already painful, I hug my husband and my mom hoping that they could take it away. And it hurts so much to think how hard it is for them to see me suffer. I pray yes, but it came to a point that I dont even know what to pray for. So I just end up crying again. I questioned God so many times already as I feel like I'm losing my grip. It gets harder each day and it's not getting any better.
I've never asked for anything grand in my life, not even a mansion. But please if you could just help me complete my treatment now as we have already maxed out our resources. We are pending for Gemcitabine cycle 4, 5 and 6. Each cycle has 3 infusions so that would mean a total of 9 infusions to go.
The medication each infusion costs 24,975.39 pesos and hospital fees costs 8234 pesos.

And if it's not too much to ask, Please pray for me that I get to spend more years with my family. Just until I see my kids happy with their own family. That is all I ask. I will forever be grateful.